Sunday, June 20, 2010

Immer Papa

Immer Papa is German for always Daddy. It sounds really nice until your over wired, over tired 7 year old adoptive Chinese daughter says it to you. Immer Papa…I always want Papa not Mama! Ouch! Sarah was at the church retreat this weekend. She had a great time. But tonight she refused to settle down and go to bed. And she also meanly refused to let me put her to bed. Only papa could do that. It’s the same mean song she sang to me when we first adopted her 3 years ago. And you know what…it still hurts! She was wired, she was tired. I should not take this personally. It’s so much easier to manipulate papa. I’m sure she was only trying to manipulate him to stay up longer. I didn’t react…but I’m telling you dear blog reader, it hurt! We are a million miles from where we first began…but some times those awful memories get the most of me! Bonding is not for sissy’s! I will always love my over wired, over tired mean mouthed Chinese daughter. I just needed to vent. She does not read my blog. I figured I could just let it go in cyber space. She will wake up sweet…and I just let this go! Juergen didn’t allow her to stay up longer. He will not let her manipulate him. At least he has grown.

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